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Choosing Our Path …

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Lake Superior Driftwood Inspiration … Which Path to Take?

DEB Art – Dream. Embrace. Believe.

Many of us have a special place that is healing for us.  Renews us.  Welcomes us.  Accepts us just as we are.  The shores of Lake Superior is ‘that place’, for me.  This piece of driftwood called to me, as I was reflecting on life.  I picked it up and brought it home.

The driftwood looks like a road to me – Life clear sailing – straight ahead … until there comes a Y.  Now I have to choose.  Life is full of choices.  Some choices are black and white, clear as day.  Others are fuzzy, spider-leggy – going out in every direction.  Living life – we choose.  The thing of it is … any choice … it’ll be ok.  Mistake?  Lesson learned.  Make a new choice.  Thank goodness for options, hm?  Not choosing, is also a choice, which took a while for me to understand … I get it now.

Author, Mike Dooley, has a great analogy.  He talks about a GPS System we put our outcome on life into – our destination choice.

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Photo by Mike Bird on Pexels.com

(My friend, Cindy, referred to GPS as God-Powered-System – love it!).  Once it’s entered, we trust the GPS to get us ‘there’.  Sometimes, there are detours, unexpected stops, open-flying freeways – you get the idea.  We simply trust, the GPS will ultimately get us there … despite worries, despite unforeseen happenings, despite overthinking something to the Nth Degree … we get there.  Wisdom teaches us … worry doesn’t help … nor does overthinking.  That GPS – God-Powered System – has our back.

I loved how the driftwood Y’d out … and came back to center.  I put a clear crystal in copper (connection) with a feather = Spirit/God.  The beads and shells are choices and experiences along the way.  One took a little bit longer, meandering and experiencing life, but all came from the center.

My encouragement to you: Trust.  Make choices as best you can.  There will be mistakes.  There will be lessons learned.  You will become more wise with each lesson you experience.  Life isn’t always a open-flying freeway – enjoy it when it is.  Breathe through the detours.  Trust (again).  Take time-out to enjoy a place that fills you up and restores you.  Don’t forget to ask for help when you need it … and be grateful for the blessings that unfold.

How’s your journey going?

Thank you for joining me on mine!

See More DEB Art.

Naniboujou Lodge … Here We Come!

Road Trip Begin

#NaniboujouLadies2019

We’re Doing a Road Trip!

Pam, Becky … Leslie, Debbie & AnnMarie (Photo by Leslie)

It was in the middle of our freezing, snowy winter Minnesota winter – 2019, when AnnMarie sent me a text, “Let’s get together, I want to run an idea past you!”.  Her idea was a get-away weekend to the Naniboujou Lodge in northern Minnesota.  Early summer, please.  Because, well, why wait any longer than we have to for an adventure?  I was on board in a nano second.  There was that rope of hope … the carrot dangling … to make it through the rest of winter.

We gathered in a few of our besties, and made our reservations.  We talked to a real live person, who was very helpful, sharing the best of what they offered.  Award-winning food.  Spotless Rooms.  Solarium.  2nd Story Deck.  Tea Time.  Coffee available at 7am (yay!).

BIG perk: NO Wifi, NO TV.  We were getting away from the rest of the world. 

And then … of course … beautiful Lake Superior … lapping and crashing on the shore.

Peace and excitement washed through me with the confirmation of our reservations.  It made everything real.  Early June couldn’t come soon enough.

It finally came!

We met at 9am Friday morning and headed out,  it was 87 degrees!   Five and a half hours of straight-through drive time.  We would stop and check out fun stuff along the way … and take time to stretch.  We packed lunches and ate on Old Highway 61, at a roadside picnic table.  It was windy and freezing!!  The temp had dropped about 20 degrees.

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Beautiful and freezing.  Hair … blowing in the wind!

We are simply happy! (Photo by me)

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Me! (Photo by Becky)

The terrain changes considerably from central Minnesota to Lake Superior shores.  From woods and fields to rocks and hills.  It’s stunning.  The tree buds were beginning to burst open, whereas at home, our leaves are unfurled and getting bigger and bigger by the day.

On the road Naniboujou

One of my Woodland Spirits rode with us! (Photo by Leslie)

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Black Beach in Silver Bay (Photo by Becky)

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Follow the shore-line up the left … Here they are! (Photo by Becky)

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We found a quiet cove, away from the wind.  The sand on the beach was so warm.

We took naps, letting Mother Earth fill us up … as we let go of all our stress.  It.Was.Amazing.  (Photo by me – I couldn’t resist)

The shift we felt as we headed on our last leg of the journey was significant.  We truly had left our cares and worries at Black Beach.  Another 90 minutes to go … Naniboujou Lodge was getting closer by the minute.

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                         We made it!

Unloaded.  5 Women = Lots of stuff. (For some of us, anyways!)  Photo by me.

Months of planning and anticipation had come to this …

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Dining Room – Photo by Becky.

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And this …

Sigh … My happy feet and happy heart.

More to come ….

Please ‘Like & Share’ if you like joining me/us on the journey!

 

This Chair Has Stories To Tell … #1

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A Nurturing Chair

Filled with compassion, healing energy and Love.

I am an Energy Worker.

Holding a space for people to …

be vulnerable …

be real …

be their calm/holding it together selves …

be their messy-life selves …

be their stressed-out-to-the-max selves …

be their sad and scared selves …

be their angry selves …

be … exactly who they are.

No judgement here.

This chair holds sadness, fear, hopes and dreams.  It is a pathway to self-worth, self-care and self-love.  It opens a door to understanding, forgiveness and healing … and hope.

#1 – A husband has died in the mid-night hours.  His wife called to see if I had anytime later the following morning to see her, after the funeral-home details were dealt with.  Coming in, would fill her up enough to deal with the days ahead.  She came in.  Trying to hold it all together.  Be strong.  Afraid to feel too deeply, or she’d never stop crying, the dam would burst.  She didn’t want people to see her ‘not in control’.

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Photo by Kat Jayne on Pexels.com

The dam needed to burst.  It did.  A torrent of emotions poured out of her …

sadness …

anger …

fear …

so darn vulnerable …

heart-break.

After the emotional flow released … she was able to ebb one minute at a time.  Breathing and getting through the days and weeks ahead.

She asked, and gave herself permission to receive  in the following weeks and months …

Healing touch.

Compassion.

Love.

She did not have to walk this walk alone.

This chair, holds each person sacred.  I hold them in Light and Love.

The story continues …

Thank you for joining me on the journey!  Share with others if this resonates with you.

Namaste

Debbie

Details on my Energy Work Here.

 

The Folks Have Died … Treasures and Stuff to Process

Whew.

With the passing of our folks, we were left with raw emotions, exhaustion and an estate needing to be dealt with.  A Fambly Circle was called by me, the new ‘Matriarch’.  My  eclectic bunch of siblings deemed me to be so, as the eldest and bossy sister.  Patrick had said, “We always do what you tell us to do, so why stop now!”

Thankfully, we had talked with Mom and Dad, and a couple of key roles were already in place before they passed.  Jake was executor and we as siblings, agreed to sell the house.  The folks had met our Realtor, Liz Timothy, early in the summer, and welcomed her insight and knowledge as to what was best to do for the successful sale – thus the shingles, mentioned in a previous blog.

Our first agreement in our Fambly Circle was to take. a. break.  We needed a time-out from everything – and create a new normal within our personal lives.  Hugs, kisses, tears, laughter and waves “Goodbye”, were exchanged as we departed en masse from the folks driveway.

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“The 7”  

Seven Siblings and Our Folks – Last Christmas Together With Them

A month or so later, we siblings only, “The 7”,  no spouses or significant others, gathered around the folks dining room table.  In honor of the folks, we started with a prayer (I think they were smiling all day long).  We took turns, eldest to youngest, stating one item at a time we wanted from the folks.  ‘Round and ’round we went, some of us bowing out after a few ’rounds … until there was silence and a sigh.  Amazing – no one wanted or had to have – something someone else had asked for.   (Gosh I love this bunch!)

We then put post-it-notes on our stuff – stopped – looked around and realized – we still had a CrAzY amount of stuff to deal with.

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Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

We decided to do a Fambly Auction, with Jake printing up “Grandpa Bucks” in various denominations.  All the Fambly was invited from babies to big people.  Everyone got the same amount of $$ to bid with.  They could combine their $$ with others, if they were hot and heavy into a purchase.  EVERYTHING purchased, had to be hauled out of the house by the end of the weekend.  Including “The 7’s” earlier items.  Jake was the Auctioneer – he was a hoot!

One of my favorite memories – My grandson Declan, was 6 years old.  He had been seriously watching and observing how this ‘bidding game’ was being played.  After a bit, Jake gave a great presentation on the giant tv console in the living room.  Declan piped up, “$10!”.  Jake said, “We’ve got $10 from Declan, do we have $15?”.  Declan yelled “$15!” (He really wanted it!)  Jake smoothed it over and asked for another bid from everyone – once – silence – twice – silence – three times – silence.  “SOLD to Declan for $10!”, declared Jake.  Everyone cheered, Declan jumped up and down, clapping his hands.  “I got it, I really, really got it!!” Jake swept his hands over the TV in the console with a flourish, “This TV, which you can see, fits perfectly inside this beautiful console, Declan just bought.  I’m asking for a bid of $5 … does anyone have a bid?”  There was silence.  “Declan, do you have a bid?”, asked Jake.  “$5!!!”, Declan said with excitement.  “SOLD to DECLAN! for $5”, yelled Jake.  Again, there were cheers from the crazy Fambly crowd!!!!

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Photo by Sara Wether on Pexels.com

After the auction … and helping each other load trailers, vans and trucks, we set a date and agreed to get back together again, as there was still – stuff.  Not as much, but still .. lots and lots of stuff.

Our final clearing was done.  I was grateful to my niece, Nicky, who took care of Mom’s closet.  Many donations to various organizations.  Mom had numerous  books from a Catholic Book Store she once owned, Hosanna House, in downtown Brainerd.  My sister, Kyung, and William, took them all to St. Francis School and donated them to their library.  Rick had a trailer that hauled things to the landfill and things everywhere else.  That felt good!

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Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Pexels.com

The hardest thing for me, when we began this process, was the beginning to do it.  My beginning to do it, was taking one of Mom’s magnets off the refrigerator.  I began to cry.  That was it for that day.  One magnet.  I left and walked across the yard, home.

Now … The house was empty except for a few things for staging. (Sigh)  We cleaned it up and had a showing.  It looked ‘dated’ was the comment from a potential buyer.  Mom liked wallpaper.  Mom liked being creative with how she hung wallpaper.  Mom liked wallpaper alot.  Colors needed to go – so did the wallpaper.  I stripped wallpaper like crazy.  Then, started to paint.  My brother, Patrick came and helped me paint … it was sad, but felt good.

The house was being filled with new light and open to new life.

…. And Sold!  Thanks, Liz!

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I love my Fambly.  We are an odd bunch, with various quirks, gifts and talents.  Love is the thread that weaves us together, holding frayed edges in place, circling together when it’s time to play or work or grieve.

My encouragement to you … Take your time when you lose someone(s).  Feel your emotions.  Be sad.  Angry.  Afraid.  Lonely.  Let them come out, don’t stuff them.  You will get waves of emotions and memories popping up unexpectedly.  It’s part of the grieving.  There is no time-line for grieving.  Take breaks.  Breathe different air.  Surround yourself with softness, kindness, understanding, forgiveness and most of all Love.  Be with people.  Be alone.  Ask for help.  Drink water.  Lots and lots of water. More tears – more water.  Remember to breathe.  Remember to eat.  Sleep.  Walk.  Walking is good.  Go to church.  Don’t go to church.  Lean on people when you need to.  Be gentle with yourself.  In your gentleness,  in your quiet time, peace will come.  In time.  God does not leave.

Thank you for sharing this walk with me. Wow, it continues to be a journey.

 If you have enjoyed this post, please share it and follow me for more posts!  Thank you!

https://www.debendres.com

 

 

Here’s the Thing … Collage Wisdom #3

20181017_063322_HDRWhat a relief!

It’s so easy to worry.  Look back with regrets.  Woulda, coulda, shoulda.  The best thing about looking back, is the wisdom I’ve gained to move forward.  It’s true – every situation has had Divine Timing.  Mind you, I did not/do not care BEING in certain life events, but when they were most difficult, Earth Angels came in at just the right moments.  They helped me walk through tough stuff with divorce, depression and single parenting.  I’ve learned much, going through the muck.  I’m stronger than I ever thought I’d be.  I’m braver.  The Universe does know exactly what it is doing and an incredible teacher.  I have to take ownership in playing my role in it.  (Not scoring 5 Stars is a reality check!  Yes, I’ll admit to less than stellar performances.)  Breathing helps, every single time!  My asking for help, being willing to change my way of thinking, being adventurous enough to try new things … like dating, for example, were keys to opening doors to new life … and believe happiness would greet me.

20181017_063303_HDR It did!

The Universe is still playing with me on the dating thing … none-the-less, my life is filled with happiness, because there are lots of doors in life to open, and I’m twisting a lot of knobs!!  Not all of them open.  I respect that now.  I don’t try to bust or jiggle them open anymore.  I’ve noticed …  light, from a door cracked open in the dark – is amazingly bright.  Look at the stars and the moon on a partly cloudy night – see how the light ebbs and flows with banks of clouds, or wisps … as the earth faithfully turns.  It’s taking time to notice a door is actually open … and being willing to walk through it and … play!

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Blessings and Love,

Namaste

Debbie

www.debendres.com

 

 

 

Here’s the Thing … Collage Wisdom #2

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Welcome to this Mini-Series on the

Unfolding Collage Wisdom of Life & Changes 

You don’t always need a plan … That’s easier said than done!  How about you?  Maybe it was the way I was raised, because, there was always a plan.  Life wasn’t in order if there wasn’t a plan.  Then, there was a back-up plan for just in case, right?  Wrapping my brain around not always having a plan has been a decades-long exercise in … breathing and allowing.  If it was exercise in the physical sense, I’d be buffed and toned beyond belief !  ‘Don’t/Always’, are key here … because sometimes plans are necessary = Life. Reality.  I’m encouraging the realization in not having a plan, is being open to possibilities that perhaps haven’t been thought of or imagined yet.

Sometimes you just need to breathe … I’ve noticed, breathing is a theme in my collage.  It’s been a word I’ve used over and over with clients.  Because, it’s so important.  Many would get gold stars for shallow breathing … it’s the deep breaths that make a difference.  That oxygen into our cells, is a bit of a miracle in itself.   I practice mindful breathing, it’s amazing how my body softens and worries melt when I consciously pay attention to my breath.  The long-term effects, for me … mellower in my response to negative events going on in life.  I’m focused on the present, this moment. Now.  So grateful.

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A recent gift from a friend … Thanks, Karen!

Let go and see what happens …  Wheee ….  Yikes … BREATHE … This is where I acknowledge how grateful I am for the gift of faith.  Letting go of the plans.  Trusting and believing Spirit/God and I are ok.  There is a time, a connection, a place greater than I can even imagine, all coming into place.   Surrendering and accepting what is right now, is a relief and also a sense of excitement.  Allowing life to surprise me in most amazing ways.  And when I let go with ease and grace and nothing is happening … in whatever I deem is a reasonable time … then I’m ok with making a move to do something.  It’s usually in-line with the whisper/nudge/tap I talked about in Collage Wisdom #1.

You don’t always need a plan.  Sometimes you just need to breathe.  Let go and see what happens.

More to come!

Blessings and Love,

Namaste

Debbie

 

Here’s the Thing … Collage Wisdom Insight #1

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I find myself, among a number of friends … experiencing life change nudges.  Intuitively, we know something is coming.  I think it’s Spirit/God’s way of giving us a heads-up.  We sense a ‘Pay Attention‘ tap on the shoulder, bump/thump on the head, or in my case, L-5 putting me in a frozen, ‘now I’ve got your attention’, pose … because I chose not to listen to the quiet whispers, taps and thumps, mostly because of fear.  Fear of changing out a career (Certified Massage Therapist & Energy Worker for 28 years).  Loss of assured income.  Losing relationships.  Being my own boss.  I’m very good at taking care of everything.  Doing it all – whew.

It was interesting, when the pain was manageable, to note it was on my left side – energetically, the feminine side, the receiving side … being vulnerable, asking for help, nurturing me, being soft and gentle.  Quiet reflection, led me to acknowledge, my taking care of everything and doing it all (male energy/right side) was overpowering, leading to my life not being in balance.  My soft, gentle side, needed me to stop doing massage work.  (Deep breath … breathe ….) Now … it was taking time to process this part of my life.  This time of change.  I decided to create a collage to help me approach things that were coming through with meditation and journaling.

I call it Collage Wisdom!

Old ways won’t open new doors.  It’s true.  Life is filled with opportunities.  It’s opening new ways of thinking … yes, new thoughts are necessary! Any age, any decade!  Time to allow dreams to filter in … What if ____ ?? How about ___ ?? It is time to admit: We know stuff. (Thank you, Janice!).  We are a mixed bag of talents.  We are not one dimensional. We are multi-dimensional and that can be what ever we choose it to be.  Yes, fear is involved.  So is bravery.  We become stronger because we are going through the fear and realize how flipping awesome we are.  Believe this with me!  Create a grand door, a cabin door, a gnome door, a magical door, a real-life door …  put your hand on the doorknob, I will too.  Let’s twist it open – ready, set, GO …

Today is a new day.

More to come!

Blessings and Love,

Namaste

Debbie