Tag Archive | heart

My Brother Died … He’s saying ‘Hello’! Thanks to Johnny Cash

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Me, in the middle of two of my 5 brothers. 

Patrick is on the left … Rick is on the right (He died last week).

Right now, things are still pretty emotional.  My brother, Rick has died.  There are so many layers to this … I’m not getting into it all right now.  And it’s ok.  Ask me questions, if you like … death is a topic we usually don’t ‘go there’ on … until it is blanketing us with reality and truth.  I’d appreciate your thoughts  …  how do you ‘do’ death?

Death is the circle of Life as we know it … here.  On earth.

There’s a whole n’other realm of Life, that we have yet to experience … when we cross over and die.  If you’ve been following my blog, you’re familiar with my first experience of ‘quiet knowing’, when my sister, Anna died.  And then my Mom and Dad … I haven’t even gotten into sharing about Tim, my second brother, who passed 2 years ago.  Because, emotionally, it’s hard to bring things back up to the surface … even when there’s peace.  Those emotions are still felt.  It’s because of Love.  It’s because we.are.connected.  Here – on earth AND on the ‘Other Side’. (Whatever you want to call it).

Last weekend, the weekend after Rick died, Fambly from the Minneapolis/St. Paul metro area, circled together for a ‘Debbie Sleepover’ in my little cottage house, up north.  We’re mighty good at this circling together thing, for which I am so grateful for.  We decided we were going to celebrate Rick = Celebrate LIFE.  In part of our conversations, I brought up the question of how Rick was going to connect with us … what was his sign going to be? I think some of my Fambly think I’m a bit goofy with this sign stuff, but I really believe in what Anna, the folks and Tim have given in their ways to say ‘Hello’.

So … we’re out listening to the band, Montana Moon at Dennis Drummond Wine Company and they play a Johnny Cash song, Folsum Prison Blues.  My brother, Patrick and I look at each other, smile, and say, ‘RICK’!!!  He played drums and harmonica’s with his band, The Gull Dam Jammers, back in the day.  After a bit, we left to spend time at Roundhouse Brewery.  It’s a favorite stop for my metro Fambly.  A band was playing way beyond their time … the last song they played … Flosum Prison Blues!!  We all cheered, ‘RICK’!!!  (The same song, within 45 minutes, from 2 entirely different bands, in 2 different venues!)  A few days later, my son and his family are moving back to the area.  Without knowing the story … My grandson is wearing a Tee-Shirt … A Johnny Cash Tee-Shirt …. (I can’t help it, I’m smiling!) …

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… and my Sister-in-law, text me today … when she walked into work … they were playing Johnny Cash …

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So … Thanks, Rick … we hear you loud and clear …

And Johnny Cash … THANK YOU!!  What a way you’ve brought us together … and made our Fambly smile!

 

The Summer of Love & Death … A Wedding!

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My brother, Mike, and bride, Dawn.

Mom was so excited for Mike and Dawn to be married!   It was time!  They had been happily together for 6 years.  Dawn brought Mom with her when she bought her wedding dress.  What fun they had!  It was a special time for Mom and Dawn.   There was a perfect space in a closet at the folks, to store it safe and sound.  That way Mike couldn’t sneak a peek!

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Photo by Machol Butler on Pexels.com

A big concern Mom had, was getting an annulment with the Catholic Church, before they were married.  Despite Mike and Dawn’s attempts in trying to do this, it wasn’t going to happen.  They talked with a Pastor and found out there is a time-frame of 9 months to 2 years for the annulment process to be completed, and just because one goes through the process, does not mean you will get one.  The cost of it, not a huge deal, was enough to add another piece of angst in the midst of things.  There was also Mom’s time-frame.  Her lung cancer diagnosis and hospice, was definitely speeding up the wedding date.

Mike was beginning to feel overwhelmed and worried.  Both he and Dawn wanted the folks to be pleased.  Mike came over and talked to me (I’m the big sister),  expressing concern, not knowing how this wedding was going to happen.  They simply loved each other and it was hard having it be so difficult – on so many levels.  I asked him if he trusted me – of course he said yes – it’s the ‘Big Sis’ thing!  I became a licensed Wedding Officiant/Minister through the Universal Life Church and our local county.  I would work with them on a beautiful ceremony and file their wedding license.  Then … Dawn, Mike and I talked with the folks, explaining it would be a legal wedding and spiritual … and at some point in time, Mike and Dawn could go through the annulment process and get the marriage blessed in the Catholic Church.  All in all, it was a special conversation and the wedding was on!

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Jake was on the music, Rochelle was on the flowers, Mike was on the venue – Lum Park, Tim was on set-up, Rick was on tools and electrical stuff, Patrick and Darlene were on host/hostessing, Nicky and William were on photography.  Laura, Jake’s wife was on helping us all be cool, calm and collected – ’cause that’s how Laura is.  We-all were on food.  Kyung was still on her work gig/assignment in Africa.

In the midst of all of this, the folks were getting new shingles on the roof.  Mom would ask me to go out and see how it was looking.  Check on the guys, make sure they had enough water …. She enjoyed all the activity.  In spite of her determination, Mom’s breathing was becoming  more labored.  She was using oxygen all the time.  Her strength was weakening.  We all loved her hospice nurse, Kelly.  She and Mom had a very special relationship.  One day, Kelly said we were going to have to look at a different way for Mom to be at the wedding.  Outside was not an option.  I sat close to Mom and told her, she would have the best seat in the house – either with live video – or in heaven.  The boys would know how to set the video stuff up, and some of us would be at the house with her and some would be at Lum Park.

Going outside with Kelly, she said the cancer was progressing much faster than we thought it would.  It was time to call Kyung home.  I needed to tell Mom.  One of the hardest things I’ve ever done.  Then Dad.  Then the rest of the Fambly.  Then close friends.  Life is real.  So is death.

There was talk of having the folks renew their wedding vows with Mike and Dawn. The wedding date moved up and in the house with Mom and Dad.  Kyung arrived. It was early evening.  She and Mom had precious hours talking and being together.  The very next morning, Mom began her journey to heaven.  The wedding would wait.  Her life was celebrated, with tears and joy.

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Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

The next weekend – was The Wedding.  I was nervous about being the Celebrant/Officiant and hoped it would go over ok. The preparation with Mike and Dawn was so special and included both her Mom and our Mom in the ceremony.  When we were finished, Dad’s home-care nurse came up to me and said Dad wanted to talk to me.  I took some deep breaths … knelt down in front of him in his wheel chair … he took my hands and with tears in his eyes, he said it was a beautiful ceremony, he was so proud of me and it was a job well done.  Oh my goodness … MY prayers were answered!

Yes … Mike and Dawn are living happily-ever-after.

And Mom … Still has the best seat in the house!

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Fambly Wedding Photo – Cheers to Mike & Dawn!

A week after Mom’s funeral and a week before Dad’s.

Mom’s Story                Dad’s Story

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https://www.debendres.com

“Skippy” … A Soul Connection

 

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I’m sharing stories I’ve personally experienced with connections to Spirit and the affirmations they bring into my life and the lives of clients.  In doing so, I hope you recognize ways God/Spirit is connecting with you.  Little signs of intuition, a premonition, a whisper or a nudge, a sign of synchronicity, a dream … there are many ways we are shown signs that can protect us, reassure us, or bring us peace.

I understand – ‘Oh, that’s just your imagination!’, ‘Don’t go there ….’, ‘Are you kidding me?’!  I’ve thought those things, too.  Over the years, these connections have become a part of my life.  Sometimes, a part of someone else’s life ….

Skippy …

Before a client comes, I settle into quiet meditation/prayer.  It helps me bring into greater awareness of Spirit/God and the client coming in.  One early afternoon, after centering/quiet time with a client, I began my energy session with her on the massage table.  I had barely started, and in my mind’s eye, there was a smallish brown mutt of a dog that was jumping on my leg and then jumping and skipping around the table – one energetic little mutt, for sure.  Sometimes, he jumped high enough to reach the top of the massage table – and did his best to distract me.  I was just beginning to be brave enough to share things I ‘saw’ with clients – but that day, I wasn’t brave enough and didn’t say anything to her about it.  We finished our time together and she left.

A few weeks later, she came in for another session.  Guess what?  The little brown mutt of a dog was back.  I knew from the last time, this little guy was going to be persistent.  It was obvious, he wanted to be seen AND acknowledged.  I took a breath, and told my client I had something to share with her and she could take it or leave it – no worries there!  Then I told her about this little brown mutt of a dog, skipping around the table like crazy.  She burst into tears.  She shared her story – a bit of it summed up here – When she was a little girl growing up, she had a little brown mutt.  They loved each other to pieces.  That dog went with her, everywhere.  He listened to her stories, he knew her friends and family, he knew her secrets, he knew her best of anyone.  He was her faithful companion, indeed.  And …

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Photo by Aleksa Bujišić on Pexels.com

… His name was Skippy.

I laughed out loud!  Skippy – of course!!

She was so happy to know he was there with her.  For the rest of the session, Skippy sat calmly on the floor.  No more jumping and skipping around.  There was just a wonderful sense of contentment and quiet joy – for both of them.

Skippy never made his presence known to me after that.  And, it’s ok.  It was the first time an animal had ‘come through’ for me.  I’m so grateful, I threw fear out the window. It was important I shared seeing Skippy with my client.

It was a gift for all 3 of us.

Skippy was a Soul Connection for her.  Yes, he is her dog.  And, it’s ok …

Spirit/God doesn’t limit love and connections with only people!

As I’ve shared in the past, stories connect us, and help us realize how amazing life is on so many levels.  You may get nudges, or hear the whispers of Spirit/God, you may not.  I don’t know when/if I will get insight, or a word, or image on any given day, week, month. It’s ok.  We’re all here, sharing the journey … quirky and amazing as it is!

Blessings and Love,

Namaste

Debbie

www.debendres.com

That Odd Little Word … Chakra!

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Wheels of Energy Throughout Our Body

In my last blog, I shared how I came to be an Energy Worker, and talked about wheels of energy called Chakras flowing (or not) in our bodies.  I realized, when I first heard about Chakras, I was taken aback because it came from ancient Hindu, Buddhism and Taoism wisdom and teachings …  Far removed from my upbringing as a Catholic and very foreign to me.  Sometimes, we fear what we don’t understand, and sometimes we’re told it’s wrong to delve into things that don’t fit into the line of particular religious teachings.  In that respect, my limited understanding is – it opens the door for evil to enter – it is not ‘Of God’ – ‘The bible says …’ – ‘The catechism says …’.  All shared in good faith and protection of one’s soul – and I have had my share of comments, concerns and anonymous letters to protect my soul and save me from the perils of hell.  I understand where these kind souls are coming from … and it’s ok.

We are each responsible for our own walk in life.  My walk has led me, through my quiet meditation time with God/Spirit, to an awareness of these energy centers, called Chakras.  I feel them, sense them in myself and in others.

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Photo by Sebastian Voortman on Pexels.com

Our bodies are filled with energy – everything miraculously working together to carry us and our Spirit through life.  Besides our bodies, we have thoughts, emotions and the Spiritual part of ourselves, that make up our whole “Being”.  All of this is energy.  It’s ebbing and flowing every minute of every day.  We can sense when someone comes into a room, we can often sense the mood they are in.  No words needed.  We feel their energy.  When someone leaves, or company goes home after a gathering, or someone dies, we feel the emptiness.  When someone is suffering, we can often feel their pain – and they may be miles away.  It is their energy.  We send them good thoughts, we send them prayers, we send good vibes, we hold them in our hearts.  This is energy flowing between us.  Soul connections.  Heart connections.  Spirit connections.  For me it’s God who’s got this all going.  Divine.  Sacred.  Universal.  Miraculous.  Precious.  Love.  Along with … Pain.  Suffering.  Loss.  Fear.  Anger. Control.  Mistakes.  Forgiveness.  And more Love.  All of this carries energy.  Lots and lots of energy.

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Sometimes energy flows and sometimes it gets stuck.  When energy gets stuck, we don’t feel well, do we?  The stuck energy can affect any one of our organs, how we breathe, how we sleep, and how we communicate with others.  We can feel grounded, safe, secure, or float-y, not able to trust or focus.  We can feel creative or blah,  confident or insecure – not able/or willing to trust our gut.  We can love and receive love, or close ourselves off from love, because we don’t want to be hurt.  We can speak our truth – or not – for fear of what others might feel, think, or say about us, or to us.  We might have flashes of intuition, where we just understand something with no need for conscious explanations, simply, a quiet knowing.  We’re open – or not – to Spirit/God and the support and guidance we are given as we walk this path called Life.  This …. all of this … is energy.  Impacting our Chakras.  Not scary.  Just real Life.  We live with these ebb and flow energies every day.  In our own unique ways.  Because that’s how we roll, we were created as individuals and no one walks our path but us.  This is the energy I work with my clients = Life.

Wisdom is wisdom.  It carries Truth through time.  Past, present and future, wisdom is supportive and thought provoking.  Wisdom came with creation – call it ancient – and will follow us through the end of time.  I look at the goodness it brings, the support it provides and the lessons it teaches.  I am grateful I was open to the confirmation I was feeling with my clients and their energies – and the link and understanding of the 7 Charkas.   I’m glad I listened to God/Spirit and was brave enough to walk through that door!  The blessings that have unfolded over the years, are countless.

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Photo by Caio Resende on Pexels.com

Here’s my sense of the 7 basic Chakras – Energy Centers in your body and the wisdom carried with them.  I’m not going into details with this … this is a blog, not a book!!  ; )

  1. Root Chakra – base of your spine – supports your basic needs – food, clothing, shelter – security, trust and stability. Color/Red
  2. Sacral – below your belly button and above your pubic bone – sexuality and creative expression.  Color/Orange.
  3. Solar Plexus – stomach – personal power – trusting your gut.  Color/Yellow
  4.  Heart – bridges our body with our mind, emotions and Spirit.  It’s our love and the connections we have with each other and a conduit to healing.  Color/Green
  5. Throat – communicating and speaking our Truth.  Color/Blue/Turquoise.
  6. 3rd Eye – Center of forehead.  Intuition/Awareness.  Color/Indigo Blue
  7. Crown – Top of head.  Spiritual Connection to God, ourselves and others.  Color/Purple

I like pictures … so here you go!  Sitting, standing, walking, skipping, sleeping … you don’t need to be sitting yogi style to recognize the energy of Chakras in your body!

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The beauty of you.  The beauty of all of us.

We all want to trust – ourselves and others.  We are sexual beings with creative juices running.  We practice the wisdom Life teaches us, and trust our gut to keep us from making a wrong move.  We desire love, give love, share love and with love, there is healing.  We communicate in many ways, trying our best to speak our truth.  Intuition is a gift – we all have – it’s trusting and practicing it!  Spirituality is our blanket, encompassing our Being while we’re here on earth, listening to the wisdom, affirmation and guidance God gives us and receiving all embracing Love.

People have asked about being Catholic – I’m not a practicing Catholic, any more.  I’m grateful for the foundation and faith I have because of being raised Catholic.  Honestly, I’m not playing within their many rules, so it’s best to be me … and continue my walk with the Love, compassion and faith I share, knowing God is present – always.  For those concerned about my eternal well-being … I’ve nearly died, and through that time, there was clarity and peace.  I know, no matter what, it’s all ok … God’s love and being true to who I am, while I’m still here … is what matters!

And so … I continue to enjoy my clients, my time with them, and the wonderful things that unfold.  If you feel off-kilter, seek a recommended Energy Worker in your area.  Personal references are the best.  Trust your gut when meeting someone new, if you are not comfortable with them, it’s ok to say so and leave. (Really – this is for ANY situation in life!!)

Thank you for following along with me!  I hope you have a better understanding about Chakras and Energy.  Until next time …  Wishing you peace and joy.

Namaste

Debbie

www.debendres.com

How I came to be an Energy Worker

 

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Photo by Valeria Boltneva on Pexels.com

The power of touch …

Cultivating Quiet Healing From Within Since 1990

I remember, nearly 30 years ago, when I was going through Massage School … the teacher had spent some of our class time talking about energy and Chakras.  I was fine with all we had been learning and training and practicing on, until this odd word and topic came up.  Chakra origin is from from Sanskrit meaning  ‘wheel or circle’.   We have 7 main wheels or circles of energy in our bodies (Chakras) – from the base of our spine to the top/crown of our head.  Mind you, I came from a strict, traditional Roman Catholic upbringing, and anything to do with ancient traditions from the Hindu Religion, Chinese Taoism and Buddhism was strictly taboo.  I made up my mind, I would leave all the Chakra stuff behind and focus entirely on the bodywork of massage therapy.

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Photo by Jeswin Thomas on Pexels.com

Back then, people still thought of massage therapy in more of the ‘flashing red light’ mentality.  Oh my … that led to some interesting encounters!   I spent the first 3 years of my practice educating clients on the benefits of therapeutic massage to help with stress management, pain management, increased flexibility and boosting their immune systems.

I was/am highly empathetic and can feel pain clients are experiencing.  In the quiet time working with them, I was becoming very much aware of the heat that would flow through my hands, and at times, there would be a feeling of something ‘blocked’ with their body.  I would spend focused time (and prayer … Catholic girl, remember), on the blocked area, hands hot with heat … and there would be a shift – and the block was gone.  I would ask clients what what happening in their life.  I was aware of the physical part of them, and also gave focus to their thoughts, emotions, and Spiritual well-being.  There seemed to be connections with the energy they had flowing or blocked and what I was feeling.

I was beginning to notice nudges – intuition – whispers of Spirit/God – dreams – to ‘pay attention’.  Circles and wheels.  Circles and wheels.  Then it clicked: Chakras.

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Photo by Navneet Shanu on Pexels.com

Hmmmm ….

I realized I was being led to look deeper into the ancient wisdom of these energy wheels in our bodies.  I was also realizing God as I knew God to be, was bigger than any box I could dream of … and the lid to that box was blown off … up into the Universe somewhere.  I was opening my heart and Spirit to what ancient wisdom had to say about energy, circles, wheels, health, balance, flow … body, mind and Spirit.

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Photo by Snapwire on Pexels.com

And when I did – everything clicked!  Chakras made sense to me.  They affirmed the awareness I was experiencing with clients.  The energy we have in our bodies is miraculous.  It helps me with the energy work I now do with clients.  The power of compassionate, loving touch, brings peace.  The questions I may ask, or the clarification I may offer, is in tune with what I am picking up with their energies – their Chakras.

And … I still pray and God is still present!  I keep listening to the whispers of Spirit/God and do my best to ‘pay attention’!  I’m grateful for the continued blessings clients receive and the energies of peace and love that follow them out the door.

With a Grateful Heart,

Namaste

Debbie

www.debendres.com

 

 

I’m “Allowing” 2019 To Be …

Allow 2019

Filled with more ease …

Less trying to make things work.  (It can be exhausting and when it doesn’t work out the way I planned, disappointment sets in. Allowing is a gentle way of letting go of control.)  I’m going to do my best with intentions and actions and allow all to unfold for my highest good.  Yes, there will be lessons to learn!  It’s ok, as some of those lessons will be life adventures and surprises … I wonder what they will be?!

In 2019 I will Allow …

… More time for PLAY.  Getting out with friends, making new friends, allowing time in my day/week to spend time with people who fill me up, share their wisdom and enjoy moments together.  Things like theater, art, music, heart to heart conversations, sharing meals out and meals in, laughter and tears.  Walks and talks.

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… My heart to be open to DATING.  That goes along with PLAY, I think, plus perfect order and Divine timing!

… I will allow ART in more minutes = hours – and the creative process it brings through Spirit.

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… My PASSION WITH CLIENTS to continue growing and unfolding, bringing to them (and me), healing, compassion, spiritual growth, wisdom, Truth, love and light.

… Time for NURTURING SELF-CARE.  Schedule regular massages (Check/DONE! Yay!) and Chiropractic adjustments.  Look into acupuncture @ Better Days Acupuncture in Brainerd.  I hear Julienne’ Gienger, LAC is amazing.  Plus the simple things … like gentle morning stretches, qigong, walks and talks, hikes and exploring.  Nature is very nurturing to me.

… Continued MORNING MEDITATION AND JOURNAL time.  I call it my “Morning coffee with God”.  No matter what – it keeps me grounded.

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Photo by Jonas Mohamadi on Pexels.com

… Enjoyable time WRITING on a regular basis.  Mostly, here, blogging, and Instagram.  If it isn’t enjoyable, nothing flows.  So allowing my brain to realize this time is filled with magical moments to see words unfold into something that can connect with others is magical, indeed.

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Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

I find, over the years, choosing a Word of the Year has helped me create more in my life.  This year my hope is to create more ease – and trust Spirit/God, Angels and Guides will be right alongside me every minute of this New Year.

Do you have a word for 2019?  I’d love to hear what it is!

Happy New Year!

Blessings and Love,

Namaste

Debbie

www.debendres.com

 

 

Here’s the Thing … Collage Wisdom #2

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Welcome to this Mini-Series on the

Unfolding Collage Wisdom of Life & Changes 

You don’t always need a plan … That’s easier said than done!  How about you?  Maybe it was the way I was raised, because, there was always a plan.  Life wasn’t in order if there wasn’t a plan.  Then, there was a back-up plan for just in case, right?  Wrapping my brain around not always having a plan has been a decades-long exercise in … breathing and allowing.  If it was exercise in the physical sense, I’d be buffed and toned beyond belief !  ‘Don’t/Always’, are key here … because sometimes plans are necessary = Life. Reality.  I’m encouraging the realization in not having a plan, is being open to possibilities that perhaps haven’t been thought of or imagined yet.

Sometimes you just need to breathe … I’ve noticed, breathing is a theme in my collage.  It’s been a word I’ve used over and over with clients.  Because, it’s so important.  Many would get gold stars for shallow breathing … it’s the deep breaths that make a difference.  That oxygen into our cells, is a bit of a miracle in itself.   I practice mindful breathing, it’s amazing how my body softens and worries melt when I consciously pay attention to my breath.  The long-term effects, for me … mellower in my response to negative events going on in life.  I’m focused on the present, this moment. Now.  So grateful.

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A recent gift from a friend … Thanks, Karen!

Let go and see what happens …  Wheee ….  Yikes … BREATHE … This is where I acknowledge how grateful I am for the gift of faith.  Letting go of the plans.  Trusting and believing Spirit/God and I are ok.  There is a time, a connection, a place greater than I can even imagine, all coming into place.   Surrendering and accepting what is right now, is a relief and also a sense of excitement.  Allowing life to surprise me in most amazing ways.  And when I let go with ease and grace and nothing is happening … in whatever I deem is a reasonable time … then I’m ok with making a move to do something.  It’s usually in-line with the whisper/nudge/tap I talked about in Collage Wisdom #1.

You don’t always need a plan.  Sometimes you just need to breathe.  Let go and see what happens.

More to come!

Blessings and Love,

Namaste

Debbie